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March 25, 2014 | 7:50 a.m. CST
The Muppets are a classic act in American entertainment. Everyone adores Kermit the Frog’s kindness and winces at Miss Piggy’s awkward advances on the poor amphibian. Yet, the duo is a characteristic example of family-approved filmmaking at its best, especially with the scores of supporting characters in tow.
What I want to tell you is that the Muppet’s latest venture, Muppets Most Wanted, is an abounding success; I want to say that it was endearing, charming and captured the hearts of everyone in the theater. Alas, this is not the case. Not only is the plot lacking in depth, cleverness and humor, but the jokes are simply bad. The film couldn’t even hold the attention of the children sitting next to me. Some even snoozed the two plus hours away, while their parents noticeably groaned at some of the terrible one-liners.Related Movie
Sure, there are a ton of celebrity cameos that are entertaining but they can’t and don’t carry the weight of the film. Ricky Gervais singing also just doesn’t work. Ugh, it just so doesn’t. There are even awkward sexual jokes and innuendoes throughout the film that made me winch. For instance, Tina Fey’s masturbatory closet brimming with Kermit memorabilia is kind of gross; even more disturbing is when she begins making out with a photo of the leading man. Just no.
Maybe I’m taking this too far and maybe I should tell you more about the plot of the film. But there’s really no point. The film was a severe disappointment and I wouldn’t want to inflict it upon any of you. So, please just avoid this film at all costs. Save yourself and your children the peace of mind and go see Frozen again. I promise that you won’t regret it, even if you do end up humming “Let It Go” for another week afterward.